Fireflies

I was surfing YouTUBE and a video grabbed my attention because of its name. The video was ‘Fireflies’ and singer was ‘Owl City (Adam Young)’. I loved the lyrics, the video and the meaning too.

It starts with

You would not believe your eyes 

If ten million fireflies

Light up the world as I fell asleep

Cause they fill the open air

And leave teardrops everywhere

You'd think me rude 

But I would just stand and stare

I'd like to make myself believe that planet earth turns slowly

It's hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep

Cause everything is never as it seems

I can say a perfect description for a dream, which is full of good moments.

One can easily relate it to the sequence of life, which could have been filled with teardrops. Good moments are like fireflies, they will look good from the distance, but when you are trying to achieve it, there is hardly any fire remains. Still planet earth turns, slowly.

It so happens sometime, that I think about myself, what I’m doing, how I’m doing and why I’m doing it. Not all things carry proper answers, but not much things remain unanswered. Sometimes I feel that I am running behind fictitious things, which will hardly happen. But on the next moment, I am very sure that, if the decision was incorrect then I would have stumbled in-between as a result. Thus whatever I am doing is correct.

Cause I'd get a thousand hugs

From ten thousand lightning bugs

As they tried to teach me how to dance

A foxtrot above my head

A sock hop beneath my bed

A disco ball is just hanging by a thread

All the things are in place, so does I. and as planet earth turns, slowly, it will take some time for me to get results, get some concrete facts about whatever I am doing.

Leave my door open just a crack 

Cause I feel like such an insomniac 

Why do I tire of counting sheep? 

When I'm far too tired to fall asleep

To ten million fireflies

I'm weird cause I hate goodbyes

I got misty eyes as they said farewell 

But I'll know where several are

If my dreams get real bizarre

Cause I saved a few and I keep them in a jar

“I’m weird cause I hate goodbyes”, This could have been a major reason behind few of the important things, I am doing. For me the definition of success would be

“Loving yourself, loving what I do, how I do and why I’m doing it”

And as I am loving the reason for which I am doing it, I need not to worry about the future. This feeling always motivates me towards my goal.

I'd like to make myself believe that planet earth turns slowly

It’s hard to say that I'd rather stay awake when I'm asleep

Because my dreams are bursting at the seams

Video from YouTUBE

Second thought

"Life never has rewind button", a thought used till flat by many hindi movies. Even we often think, if it was possible to do this, the result might have been better. 

Now a days I am busy like anything, hardly had time to give first thought to most of the things. But on a moment, I was in a position to give second thought about a thing, I preserved in a silent corner of my mind. For a moment, I thought its enough now...'n I am on the verge for second thought.

Every moment, contributed to me, one or the other way. What I am is a collaborative product of sum of all moments, rather what I am not is the direct result of it. Second thought is for looser, who are not satisfied with the situation they are in, though ironically they made themselves into the situation

 Its not a day or an hour, which made us think about our relations, our decisions or our life. Its the whole set of circumstances. If one wants to show affection about a decision, relation or life, this was the moment. In a movie, Matrix, NEO has been asked for two choice, Love or Life. He goes for Love. I think the reason being, Life is not possible without Love. He would have given second thought there, and that would have turned the whole scenario upside down.  Pessimistically, for me, suicide is the way to show your affection toward your life. If one don't have life as he/she expects, he/she has full right to ask for better beginning. But how many of the people think this much before it is a key question.

On the other hand, is it like second thought always gives wrong direction. The answer is 'NO'; atleast for me. The reason being, second thought is always a kind of dreamy creation about better future, built when nothing can realize it. Its like a horizon, which will extent further. 

Looking back is different again, when you are not worried about your previous decisions, then you can enjoy your journey down memory lane. 

"Night is off and there is morning again

All my dreams are gone

Back to life Insane"

Earth DAY...some thoughts

22nd April, celebrated world-wide as International Earth DAY. This year, there were hardly any celebrations in India, as it was not some marketing event, or globally renowned cash flow point like valentines day or friendship day.

For the few people, who atleast cares about there is something called EARTHDAY, it is another warning bell. Yesterday was 40th Earthday, but problems are residing within us for few more decades. When earthday started, there was no word like green movement and hardly anyone knows about global warming. For so many years, an ordinary person like me, was not much acquainted about the words, EL-nino, global warming, greenhouse gases etc. But now the effects are on our doorsteps. This is ARPIL running, and at my place, red-mark of temperature is already above the historic records. Same is the case, almost everywhere. 

World shattered few weeks before by a series of earthquakes, which deserted a small civilization at Haiti, continued the things in Peru and other places. For last two weeks Eyjafjallajokull volcano is controlling, one of  the most happening industry in the world. All around chaos in the Airline industry is affecting the world, education, business and of-course tourism. Still we are interested in building palm island and world island in the sea.

I am not much pessimistic about future, rather I was not; later I quit. This is a safest way to reduce burden from my brain-processor, which is already overclocked and working restlessly. This is a short term measure. Sometimes I feel that, all the cartel together, industries, billionaire, politicians and scientists are fooling  us, with the glowing shiny picture of tomorrow, which will be there but with a heavy cost.

Sometimes I fear, may be the next generation will be the luckiest one, as they will enjoy much more advanced technology, with some last green patches on the earth. Generation next to them, will only find an earth filled up with the machines, dust and some mechanical personalities, which will work for food, pleasure and money. The green plants, might be available in the museums or to be sold with highest cost, with a tag of LIMITED EDITION. Agriculture might become just food generation industry, with controlled environment, genetically modified seeds, chemicals and electronic surveillance. 

                                      

I can recall a Disney PIXAR movie, 'WALL-E', which was a blockbuster last year. There was an incidence about the last human civilian, in the space station, which was periled by formation of new biosphere on the once-upon-a-time abandoned Earth, which was full of dust, metal and plastics. Just because, that will eliminate the need for space station and the economy running on it, will suffer. Exactly the human nature of opposing the change.

Tomorrow if something goes wrong, these cartel members will investing it weatherproof bunkers or ships like noah's ark to save themselves, from the money, which we paid once upon a time, just to have some pleasurable things.

Here we need change. Because we need our Earth. 

Together, what we can do. Just few simple things, can change the world.

1. Reduce the use of plastic, use jute bags or bags made up of cloths.

2. Control the use of vehicles for the small distances or else use a public transport measures.

3. Do not print an email unless it is necessary.

4. Open your windows, there is abundant light available outside. 

5. Evening can be pleasurable without air-conditioner, just take a walk in nearby garden.

6. Plant a tree as a memory of every special moment in the life, if it is not possible to plant, you can sponsor or donate a tree to public garden. 

After so much and so on, our world is still beautiful, lets keep it as it is for the coming generations.

Looking back looking ahead...

Today, on the verge of ending year, I felt like, an eternal part of mine, I'm leaving bahind, in the form of experiences and memories.

2009, I can simply classify it as a year of disappointments and dark clouds over my life. But the purpose of this retrospection is to focus the golden border of this dark cloud, because that is gain for me, because I feel, every defeat, every rejection or every denial, contributes in to a treasure called experience.

I tried so many different things this year.Cleared the initial screening exam for the interview into mass communication company(which I never thought I could do), ventured into totally alien territory of hosted open-source solutions, visited the great city of Ahmadabad, got some good friends like 'sachin c.', I programmed something after a considerable break of 2+ years, and nevertheless, took few bold decisions to redirect my career.

I think, this is not the occasion to enter into the depths of past...

Tomorrow, I didn't expect anything new. Because its just a change in calender. But as usual, a whole new day will be waiting for me, as it was for last 365 times in 2009 and for 25 years for me.

Being an optimistic individual, I expect lot many things (again) from this year. These are not new year resolutions, but just expectations. Some of them are like, getting a good job, getting engaged this year (hopefully) and getting a visa stamped on my brand new passport.


ALVIDA 2009
and
Colorful wishes for the Fresh and New year 2010...